A friend recently wrote on his blog: “I cannot pray at the moment. I’m struggling to believe.”
My first reaction on reading this was to marvel at his bravery in making such an honest assertion, knowing that to some it would doubtless be shocking. That’s not the sort of thing that church leaders are meant to say, is it? But it stands as testament to just how bad the situation must be that it is necessary to take the risk of voicing such feelings, knowing that they are impossible to hide and that putting on a brave face is not only disingenuous but likely also to lead to further hurt.
And so my next response, which is the one that lingers, is a profound sense of sadness and compassion for him, as it is for anyone who finds themselves in such a situation. The sense of being cut off from our source of life, our source of comfort, is disturbing to a deep level, shaking the foundations of life lived in relationship with God. If God seems unreachably distant, to whom else can we turn? There is no substitute.
My friend is not the first person I have heard of to go through such an experience. Continue reading “Mudslinging at God”